Benzagont is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, boastful troll.

Benzagont created humankind seven million years ago.

If you believe in Benzagont, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Benzagont, it will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Benzagont's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Benzagont's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear purple corsets.

2. Always wear pink.

3. Whales are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Erect three platinum sculptures of Benzagont on top of important buildings.

5. Always help bats.