Carnakomin is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, ill-tempered salamander.

Carnakomin created time and space four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Carnakomin, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Carnakomin, he will turn you into a giant snail.

Carnakomin's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Carnakomin's Holy Commandments

1. Erect eight gold sculptures of Carnakomin on top of important buildings.

2. Never think ill of sick bats.

3. Always help sick tortoises.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Do not commit murder.