Cumbagshavbumjonben is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, thoughtless gnu.

Cumbagshavbumjonben created Europe six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cumbagshavbumjonben, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Cumbagshavbumjonben, it will destroy your favourite solar system.

Cumbagshavbumjonben's most sacred site is Chilhac in France.

Cumbagshavbumjonben's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear yellow.

2. Never think about quantum field theory near gulls while wearing cyan scarves and balancing nine silicon spheres on your hands.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Do not drink water in gray rooms.

5. Always treat rats with great respect.