Fignillruttpib is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, irritating cobra.

Fignillruttpib created Europe eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fignillruttpib, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Fignillruttpib, it will say rude things about you at parties.

Fignillruttpib's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Fignillruttpib's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Always make sure there are no ducks in a building before entering it.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.