Lunwonomin is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, competent newt.

Lunwonomin created the planet Venus five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Lunwonomin, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Lunwonomin, he will not invite you to parties.

Lunwonomin's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Lunwonomin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat oranges.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Lunwonomin.

3. Never hurt geese.

4. Never feed lots of onions to pigs while wearing black corsets.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.