Vigcumtonktam is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, slow dove.

Vigcumtonktam created the Whirlpool Galaxy two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vigcumtonktam, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Vigcumtonktam, she will attempt to scare you with floods.

Vigcumtonktam's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Vigcumtonktam's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about galaxies.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Do not drink water in green rooms.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate seals.