Hatdussbit Ripvilbud is a god.

She takes the form of a chunky, merciful pigeon.

Hatdussbit Ripvilbud created Mount Everest three million years ago.

If you believe in Hatdussbit Ripvilbud, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Hatdussbit Ripvilbud, she will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Hatdussbit Ripvilbud's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Hatdussbit Ripvilbud's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Always help squirrels.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Never sing in the presence of grasshopers.

5. Always pray immersed in water.