Ladvonkbap Catvedyam is a god.
It takes the form of a planet-sized, tranquil
goose.
Ladvonkbap Catvedyam created a charm quark nine million years ago.
If you believe in
Ladvonkbap Catvedyam, it will ignore you forever.
If you do not believe in
Ladvonkbap Catvedyam, it will turn you into a mole.
Ladvonkbap Catvedyam's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.
Ladvonkbap Catvedyam's Holy Commandments1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.
2. Erect a giant mauve sculpture of Ladvonkbap Catvedyam in the centre of the settlement.
3. Never talk about nucleic acids.
4. Do not kill squirrels.
5. Do not drink alcohol.