Motbiftim is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, resourceful wyrm.

Motbiftim created the planet Mars eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Motbiftim, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Motbiftim, she will turn you into an amoeba.

Motbiftim's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Motbiftim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about peas.

2. Never feed peanuts to cats while wearing mauve hats.

3. Never eat melons.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Never look in ponds.