Nurlyambad is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, competent tortoise.

Nurlyambad created the Small Magellanic Cloud nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nurlyambad, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Nurlyambad, he will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Nurlyambad's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Nurlyambad's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt whales.

2. Do not dye your hair black.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Never mention cats.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.