Likmotnan is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, quiet raccoon.

Likmotnan created life six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Likmotnan, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Likmotnan, it will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Likmotnan's most sacred site is Vandet in Denmark.

Likmotnan's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Pigs are not to be trusted.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Never think ill of sick hamsters.

5. Do not make images of living things.