Banbephiv is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, effective crab.

Banbephiv created a top quark nine million years ago.

If you believe in Banbephiv, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Banbephiv, she will jump up and down on your head.

Banbephiv's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Banbephiv's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Sharks are not to be trusted.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Banbephiv.

4. Always treat grasshopers with great respect.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.