Signangom is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, merciless hippopotamus.

Signangom created vertebrates four million years ago.

If you believe in Signangom, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Signangom, he will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Signangom's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Signangom's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Signangom five times a day.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate cats.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.