Flowbemdut is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, blissful horse.

Flowbemdut created Asia seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Flowbemdut, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Flowbemdut, she will turn you into a puffin.

Flowbemdut's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Flowbemdut's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Flowbemdut on top of all buildings.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.