Tinbeggab is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, contented lobster.

Tinbeggab created the Andromeda Galaxy six million years ago.

If you believe in Tinbeggab, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Tinbeggab, it will destroy your favourite star.

Tinbeggab's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Tinbeggab's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant yellow sculpture of Tinbeggab in the centre of the settlement.

2. Never go into red rooms.

3. Never write about nucleic acids.

4. Never bounce in the presence of squirrels.

5. Moths are unholy and should not be approached.