Mutjatxuckfon Wotkikhot is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, smart cow.

Mutjatxuckfon Wotkikhot created the cosmos six million years ago.

If you believe in Mutjatxuckfon Wotkikhot, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Mutjatxuckfon Wotkikhot, he will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Mutjatxuckfon Wotkikhot's most sacred site is Letino in Italy.

Mutjatxuckfon Wotkikhot's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear purple.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Never talk about eagles.

4. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.