Xenwoncub is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, unselfish whale.

Xenwoncub created a top quark nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Xenwoncub, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Xenwoncub, he will turn you into a rat.

Xenwoncub's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Xenwoncub's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear tights.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Xenwoncub.

3. Do not commit murder.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate capybaras.

5. Do not take Xenwoncub's name in vain.