Jipgommap Straghen is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, all-powerful coyote.

Jipgommap Straghen created the Sun twelve years ago.

If you believe in Jipgommap Straghen, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Jipgommap Straghen, he will have a very low opinion of you.

Jipgommap Straghen's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Jipgommap Straghen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Feed all hungry snails.

3. Do not trade with those who eat melons.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Jipgommap Straghen.