Bigratnarl is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, staggering lobster.

Bigratnarl created the planet Mars five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bigratnarl, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Bigratnarl, he will try to impress you with rainbows.

Bigratnarl's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Bigratnarl's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Bigratnarl.