Bomtanlan is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, uncaring manatee.

Bomtanlan created matter six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bomtanlan, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Bomtanlan, he will make you grow a tail.

Bomtanlan's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Bomtanlan's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Bomtanlan.

3. Bomtanlan loves moths, so they must be honoured.

4. Never think about planets.

5. Do not take Bomtanlan's name in vain.