Lagfossben Rullhontun is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, self-confident ant.

Lagfossben Rullhontun created a photon nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Lagfossben Rullhontun, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Lagfossben Rullhontun, it will turn you into a sheep.

Lagfossben Rullhontun's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Lagfossben Rullhontun's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Erect six platinum sculptures of Lagfossben Rullhontun on top of important buildings.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Never think about optics.