Mumfontag is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, ill-tempered dragon.

Mumfontag created dark matter four million years ago.

If you believe in Mumfontag, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Mumfontag, she will turn you into a rock.

Mumfontag's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Mumfontag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Never talk about quantum gravity.

4. Mumfontag loves frogs, so they must be respected.

5. Never talk about quantum mechanics near bats while wearing white tights and balancing four silver spheres on your head.