Queeggutsig is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, calm dog.

Queeggutsig created humanity five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Queeggutsig, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Queeggutsig, he will turn you into a blue tit.

Queeggutsig's most sacred site is Ulsted in Denmark.

Queeggutsig's Holy Commandments

1. Always help ducks.

2. Run away if five great tits approach from the south.

3. Never talk about mites.

4. Never wear rings.

5. Learn nine new languages a year.