Botvanhit is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, dishonourable whale.

Botvanhit created dark matter two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Botvanhit, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Botvanhit, he will torture you forever.

Botvanhit's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Botvanhit's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear purple clothing.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Never paint your head black.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.