Gatzakbab is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, tranquil grasshopper.

Gatzakbab created the Sombrero Galaxy five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gatzakbab, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Gatzakbab, she will have a very low opinion of you.

Gatzakbab's most sacred site is Elatos in Greece.

Gatzakbab's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about moons.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Never paint your arms blue.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never talk about seals.