Bellmadnad is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, slow pig.

Bellmadnad created the Sunflower Galaxy two million years ago.

If you believe in Bellmadnad, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Bellmadnad, she will attempt to scare you with floods.

Bellmadnad's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Bellmadnad's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear kilts.

2. Never feed garlic to snails while wearing stockings.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Always make sure there are no sharks in a building before entering it.

5. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.