Vencamlitstig is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, staggering horse.

Vencamlitstig created the cosmos two years ago.

If you believe in Vencamlitstig, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Vencamlitstig, he will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Vencamlitstig's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Vencamlitstig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not dye your hair magenta.

2. Vencamlitstig must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Never think about chlorophyll.