Capbest is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, unthinking snake.

Capbest created water five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Capbest, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Capbest, she will send you a strongly worded letter.

Capbest's most sacred site is Sirama in Madagascar.

Capbest's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Capbest's name in vain.

2. Never mention doves.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Erect a giant mauve sculpture of Capbest in the centre of the settlement.