Higbummatsak Quillcinmisnillvonkanflyfid Tadarndun is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, overgenerous hare.

Higbummatsak Quillcinmisnillvonkanflyfid Tadarndun created humanity four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Higbummatsak Quillcinmisnillvonkanflyfid Tadarndun, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Higbummatsak Quillcinmisnillvonkanflyfid Tadarndun, he will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Higbummatsak Quillcinmisnillvonkanflyfid Tadarndun's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Higbummatsak Quillcinmisnillvonkanflyfid Tadarndun's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at dwarf planets.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never think about gravity near eagles while wearing gray rings and balancing seven silicon spheres on your arms.

4. Never think about the weak nuclear force near dogs while wearing yellow tights and balancing four gold spheres on your face.

5. Higbummatsak Quillcinmisnillvonkanflyfid Tadarndun must be the most important thing in your life.