Kaptalpid is a god.
It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, smart
ant.
Kaptalpid created time and space eighteen thousand years ago.
If you believe in
Kaptalpid, it will make you immortal.
If you do not believe in
Kaptalpid, it will say rude things about you at parties.
Kaptalpid's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.
Kaptalpid's Holy Commandments1. Never talk about dogs.
2. Do not kill eagles.
3. Never feed figs to tapirs while wearing orange rings.
4. Never feed peas to foxes while wearing scarves.
5. Always help gulls.