Abkinrutt is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, ruthless bear.

Abkinrutt created humankind seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Abkinrutt, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Abkinrutt, he will turn you into a sparrow.

Abkinrutt's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Abkinrutt's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Abkinrutt must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Put Abkinrutt first in all things.

4. Never talk about gravity.

5. Do not listen to music.