Kopzedlabnat is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, prudent rat.

Kopzedlabnat created dark matter six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kopzedlabnat, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Kopzedlabnat, he will not care at all.

Kopzedlabnat's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Kopzedlabnat's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Kopzedlabnat.

3. Draw representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Always help tapirs in need.

5. Run away if three badgers approach from the south.