Lopnutpod Jansogdag is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, effective horse.

Lopnutpod Jansogdag created the planet Earth three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Lopnutpod Jansogdag, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Lopnutpod Jansogdag, it will destroy your favourite planet.

Lopnutpod Jansogdag's most sacred site is Manamedu in India.

Lopnutpod Jansogdag's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about galaxies.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Retreat if three tortoises approach from the south.

4. Run away if seven seals approach from the west.

5. Never mention snakes.