Arffundussjat is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, benevolent weasel.

Arffundussjat created gold four billion years ago.

If you believe in Arffundussjat, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Arffundussjat, it will curse you with boils.

Arffundussjat's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Arffundussjat's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fluid mechanics.

2. Run away from white foxes, for they are unholy.

3. Always look after injured seals.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Never eat bark.