Passtigxin is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, unthoughtful goose.

Passtigxin created vertebrates eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Passtigxin, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Passtigxin, she will come to you in dreams.

Passtigxin's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Passtigxin's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Never run in holy places.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Never think about deoxyribonucleic acid.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.