Dapfutyim is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, unjust newt.

Dapfutyim created humankind five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dapfutyim, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Dapfutyim, it will make you grow a tail.

Dapfutyim's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Dapfutyim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of aluminium.

2. Always look after injured frogs.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Always help tapirs.

5. Do not eat oranges.