Tamnakpopsugripdubgepbaf is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, confident lion.

Tamnakpopsugripdubgepbaf created light four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tamnakpopsugripdubgepbaf, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Tamnakpopsugripdubgepbaf, she will laugh at you.

Tamnakpopsugripdubgepbaf's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Tamnakpopsugripdubgepbaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed peanuts to otters while wearing white corsets.

2. Hide from blue snakes for they are unholy.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Paint representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place in gray.

5. Do not sit in public.