Hubzogvab Bumflagnur is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, selfish frog.

Hubzogvab Bumflagnur created a bottom quark four billion years ago.

If you believe in Hubzogvab Bumflagnur, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Hubzogvab Bumflagnur, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Hubzogvab Bumflagnur's most sacred site is Temmes in Finland.

Hubzogvab Bumflagnur's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of spinach to horses while wearing black scarves.

2. Never paint your chest indigo.

3. Do not take Hubzogvab Bumflagnur's name in vain.

4. Never think about the weak nuclear force near hamsters while wearing mauve dresses and balancing three silicon spheres on your arms.

5. Never hurt gulls.