Femnulstaf is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, duplicitous chicken.

Femnulstaf created the planet Earth five million years ago.

If you believe in Femnulstaf, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Femnulstaf, it will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Femnulstaf's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Femnulstaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about ultrasonics.

2. Do not kill mites.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Do not keep four manatees in a large pit.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.