Cedqueegyik is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, bad-tempered weasel.

Cedqueegyik created the solar system five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cedqueegyik, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Cedqueegyik, he will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Cedqueegyik's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Cedqueegyik's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Erect a giant black sculpture of Cedqueegyik in the centre of the settlement.

3. Never look at moons.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.