Lamcebnur is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, happy spider.

Lamcebnur created the Black Eye Galaxy eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Lamcebnur, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Lamcebnur, he will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Lamcebnur's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Lamcebnur's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed bread to geese while wearing blue jumpers.

2. Never look at moons.

3. Pray towards the west.

4. You must pray to Lamcebnur three times a day.

5. Never wear orange kilts.