Sansabtargbutquatfarn is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, confident dolphin.

Sansabtargbutquatfarn created dark energy eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sansabtargbutquatfarn, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Sansabtargbutquatfarn, he will have a very low opinion of you.

Sansabtargbutquatfarn's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Sansabtargbutquatfarn's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear indigo rings.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Erect nine nickel sculptures of Sansabtargbutquatfarn on top of important buildings.

5. Pigs are not to be trusted.