Hontadgam Genmifquim is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, sapient ferret.

Hontadgam Genmifquim created the planet Mars three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hontadgam Genmifquim, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Hontadgam Genmifquim, he will curse you with boils.

Hontadgam Genmifquim's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Hontadgam Genmifquim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of tin.

2. Learn five new languages a year.

3. Never talk about solid mechanics near badgers while wearing indigo shorts.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never talk about cell theory.