Fligsogbeg Stikappbem is a god.

He takes the form of a large, contented meerkat.

Fligsogbeg Stikappbem created the solar system five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fligsogbeg Stikappbem, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Fligsogbeg Stikappbem, he will turn you into a plant.

Fligsogbeg Stikappbem's most sacred site is Penpont in Scotland.

Fligsogbeg Stikappbem's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat parsnips.

2. Never wear stockings.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.