Quamfagkintailwabnel is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, weak dove.

Quamfagkintailwabnel created the planet Venus four million years ago.

If you believe in Quamfagkintailwabnel, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Quamfagkintailwabnel, he will have a low opinion of you.

Quamfagkintailwabnel's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Quamfagkintailwabnel's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt dogs.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Do not drink water in white rooms.

4. Always look after injured seals.

5. Always make sure there are no foxes in a building before entering it.