Quillkapbog is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, tiresome bat.

Quillkapbog created the Milkyway six million years ago.

If you believe in Quillkapbog, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Quillkapbog, he will destroy your favourite star.

Quillkapbog's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Quillkapbog's Holy Commandments

1. Always help mice.

2. Never wear purple ear rings.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Retreat if six aardvarks approach from the west.

5. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.