Manyimpit Hatbemnab is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, self-confident slug.

Manyimpit Hatbemnab created the cosmos eight million years ago.

If you believe in Manyimpit Hatbemnab, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Manyimpit Hatbemnab, she will destroy your home planet.

Manyimpit Hatbemnab's most sacred site is Vinezac in France.

Manyimpit Hatbemnab's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed cherries to horses while wearing purple hats.

2. You must pray to Manyimpit Hatbemnab five times a day.

3. Retreat if nine turtles approach from the west.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Always help sick tapirs.