Kenfasmetcuss is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, self-confident gnu.

Kenfasmetcuss created the Small Magellanic Cloud seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Kenfasmetcuss, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Kenfasmetcuss, she will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Kenfasmetcuss' most sacred site is Thethampakkam in India.

Kenfasmetcuss' Holy Commandments

1. Never think about electromagnetism near dolphins while wearing purple ear rings and balancing six gold spheres on your back.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Hide if four squirrels approach from the west.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.