Bemwodbadhabmidtalgodgof is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, astonishing snail.

Bemwodbadhabmidtalgodgof created a down quark eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bemwodbadhabmidtalgodgof, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Bemwodbadhabmidtalgodgof, he will attempt to scare you with strong winds.

Bemwodbadhabmidtalgodgof's most sacred site is Didy in Madagascar.

Bemwodbadhabmidtalgodgof's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into fawn rooms.

2. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.

3. Never talk about moons.

4. Do not take Bemwodbadhabmidtalgodgof's name in vain.

5. Put Bemwodbadhabmidtalgodgof first in all things.