Tailpandan is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, capable hedgehog.

Tailpandan created the Cigar Galaxy nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Tailpandan, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Tailpandan, it will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Tailpandan's most sacred site is Vinezac in France.

Tailpandan's Holy Commandments

1. Erect nine titanium sculptures of Tailpandan on top of important buildings.

2. Do not drink water in orange rooms.

3. Never laugh in the presence of snails.

4. Do not eat cherries.

5. Always wear yellow.